| Home Study Sheets Archives Third Quarter 2009 | Email | Print |
|
God Speaks Both Languages
Genesis 1:26-28 (The Message)
“God spoke: “Let us make human beings in our image, make them
reflecting our nature
so they can be responsible for the fish in the sea,
the birds in the air, the cattle,
And, yes, Earth itself,
and every animal that moves on the face of Earth.’
God created human beings;
he created them godlike,
Reflecting God's nature.
He created them male and female.
God blessed them:
‘Prosper! Reproduce! Fill Earth! Take charge!
Be responsible for fish in the sea and birds in the air,
for every living thing that moves on the face of Earth.’”
“The golden rule is the principle of true courtesy, and its truest illustration is seen in the life and character of Jesus. Oh, what rays of softness and beauty shone forth in the daily life of our Saviour! What sweetness flowed from His very presence! The same spirit will be revealed in His children. Those with whom Christ dwells will be surrounded with a divine atmosphere. Their white robes of purity will be fragrant with perfume from the garden of the Lord. Their faces will reflect light from His, brightening the path for stumbling and weary feet” (Thoughts from the Mount of Blessing, p. 135).
“The Bible enjoins courtesy; and it presents many illustrations of the unselfish spirit, the gentle grace, the winsome temper, that characterize true politeness. These are but reflections of the character of Christ. All the real tenderness and courtesy in the world, even among those who do not acknowledge His name, is from Him. And He desires these characteristics to be perfectly reflected in His children. It is His purpose that in us men shall behold His beauty” (The Adventist Home, p. 425).
“True courtesy is not learned by the mere practice of rules of etiquette. Propriety of deportment is at all times to be observed; wherever principle is not compromised, consideration of others will lead to compliance with accepted customs; but true courtesy requires no sacrifice of principle to conventionality. It ignores caste. It teaches self-respect, respect for the dignity of man as man, a regard for every member of the great human brotherhood” (The Adventist Home, p. 425).
GOD SPEAKS BOTH LANGUAGES
“What are you talking about?”
Tim was 15 years old and had just started “dating.” (Of course, this “dating” consisted primarily of talking on the phone and telling his girlfriend that he really, really liked her—as she did him.)
One particular time when Tim’s girlfriend was telling in about her day, in greatest detail, he sort of—well—fell asleep on the phone with her. You can imagine how upset she was when she found out that he had been sleeping. How had she found out? He had started to snore! He tried to explain to her that he didn’t need to hear about her day in quite so much detail, but she just couldn’t understand it at all.
John Gray wrote a book called Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus. In this book, Gray sets up the idea that men and women, or guys and girls, speak a different language from one another. Anyone who has had Tim’s and his girlfriend’s experience can probably testify that this is a pretty valid idea.
However, a Christian can add something to the title. “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, but God speaks both languages!”
While none of you are planning marriage any time soon, here is some advice; God can help you understand the opposite sex! Why would He want to do that? Simply because God loves it when people communicate, and especially when they get around to communicating about Him and His love for them.
When you begin to look for that person with whom you would like to spend a great deal of time, it is important that the relationship with God that you both have
Be prominent part of your relationship. In fact, some really good advice is that you should be able to pray with the person with whom you want to have a long lasting relationship. It probably won’t solve all the miscommunications, but it surely will help!
- Does being different from the other gender excuse you from being polite and courteous? Explain.
- Why is it important to understand that guys and girls speak a different language?
- How can being a good Christian at all times help you as you try to communicate?
- Take a few minutes and jot down some times when your communication failed and caused a huge misunderstanding (at home, at school, at church).
Matthew 7:12 (Contemporary English Version)
“Treat others as you want them to treat you. This is what the Law and the Prophets are all about.”
“In our dealings with one another, we are to keep in constant exercise the principle of mutual forbearance and helpfulness. Our sympathies are to go out to those around us. We are to be courteous and considerate to all. The poor are to be aided, the sick visited, the sorrowing and the bereaved comforted, the inexperienced counseled, the faint-hearted made more hopeful. All such acts help the hand that helps” (Ellen G. White, Signs of the Times, May 11, 1904).
HERE’S WHAT I THINK
First, think about how girls would react to this situation. Then think how a group of guys would react: You’re sitting in class, and your friend (of the same sex) walks in. You know your friend has been talking with his or her boyfriend/girlfriend. Your friend is visibly upset, red eyes, splotchy face, etc. You are concerned, and you look to your group of friends who are all around you. Since the teacher has not yet entered into the classroom, you have some time to react. You are a girl; what do you do? You are a guy; what do you do?
Go to http://guidemagazine.org/rtf to post your answers. Be upfront and honest. Say what you think. Your thoughts and feelings may seem clearer to you when you write them down, so we’ve provided space for you here as well. You may also wish to share them with your class later.
This is a project that will take you a few minutes each day to complete. What is intended for you to see are the traits of character men and women of the Bible possessed. While you are working on this project, take time to reflect on how the men acted and reacted. Do the same with the women. Compare the two groups. God made us all, both young men and young women, in His image. We are not exact replicas of each other, just as the persons of the godhead—Father, Son, and Holy Spirit—are different. And guys and girls communicate differently. These differences are what make each of us interesting.
Following is our project for the week. You will be looking up texts and writing a brief description for each person. (As you study, you may wish to use more than one version of the Bible to get a clearer picture of what is being said.) When you have finished, compare the differences between the Bible men and women. Ask yourself: Are the differences the same today?
MEN:
Abraham—Genesis 12:1-6
Isaac—Genesis 25:27-29
Jacob—Genesis 25:27-34
Esau—Genesis 25:26-34
Joseph—Genesis 37:2-4; Genesis 39:1-3; Genesis 39:6
David—1 Samuel 16:23; 1 Samuel 16:12
Nabal—1 Samuel 25:9-11
James—Mark 3:16-18
John—Mark 3:16-18; John 20:1-3
Peter—Matthew 14:27-31; Matthew 16:16-19; Matthew 26:72-75
WOMEN:
Eve—Genesis 2:19-24
Sarah—Genesis 11:28-31; 12:10-15; 16:1-6; 18:11-14
Rebecca—Genesis 24:12-18; 24:57-60
Rachel—Genesis 29:5-7; 29:16-18
Ruth—Ruth 1:15-17; 2:16-18
Esther—Esther 2:6-8; 2:14-18; 4:14-16
Abigail—1 Samuel 25:2-19
Jezebel—1 Kings 21:24-26; 2 Kings 9:29-31
Dorcas—Acts 9:36
Eunice—2 Timothy 1:5
1 Corinthians 11:11, 12 (New Revised Standard Version)
“Men of the world study to be courteous, to make themselves as pleasing as possible. They study to render their address and manners such that they will have the greatest influence over those with whom they associate. They use their knowledge and abilities as skillfully as possible in order to gain this object. ‘The children of this world are in their generation wiser than the children of light’” (Ellen G. White, Review and Herald, August 20, 1959).
SO WHAT?
Don’t you just love that question? The reason that this topic matters is that you are coming to a time in your life when you have to make decisions concerning what you want out of your relationships with other people, male or female. God has set some boundaries that can guide us when it comes to relationships with the opposite sex. Not only this, but it is also important to try to understand the differences God created in guys and girls. These differences not only make us sometimes difficult for each other, but they also make us curious about each other. Cultivating great friendships is a fun thing to do, and it also helps us when we decide to become closer with someone of the opposite sex!
Your job in the next few years is to begin to create an idea of what you are looking for in someone you will choose to spend your life with. The more you understand the differences between guys and girls, the better off you will be when you begin that long search of finding someone whom you can truly understand and who can understand you.
Our lesson last week was about finding true friends. Do you think those principles hold true when finding a friend of the opposite sex?
How do you make good friendships? What steps do you take?
What can you learn from Jesus about making friends and being a good friend?
What is one character difference you have noticed about guy/girls?
Look up the following texts, and finish what has been written.
- Genesis 1:26 (NIV)—“Then God said,
over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground.’” - Ephesians 4:24 (NIV)—“And to put on the new self
”. - Genesis 5:2 (NIV) “
And when they were created, he called them ‘man.’” - 1 Corinthians 11:12 (NIV) “For as woman came from man,
”.
Romans 14:1 (The Message)
“Welcome with open arms fellow believers who don't see things the way you do. And don't jump all over them every time they do or say something you don't agree with—even when it seems that they are strong on opinions but weak in the faith department. Remember, they have their own history to deal with. Treat them gently.”
2 Corinthians 5:15-20 (The Message)
“Our firm decision is to work from this focused center: One man died for everyone. That puts everyone in the same boat. He included everyone in his death so that everyone could also be included in his life, a resurrection life, a far better life than people ever lived on their own.
“Because of this decision we don't evaluate people by what they have or how they look. We looked at the Messiah that way once and got it all wrong, as you know. We certainly don't look at him that way anymore. Now we look inside, and what we see is that anyone united with the Messiah gets a fresh start, is created new. The old life is gone; a new life burgeons! Look at it! All this comes from the God who settled the relationship between us and him, and then called us to settle our relationships with each other. God put the world square with himself through the Messiah, giving the world a fresh start by offering forgiveness of sins. God has given us the task of telling everyone what he is doing. We're Christ's representatives. God uses us to persuade men and women to drop their differences and enter into God's work of making things right between them. We're speaking for Christ himself now: Become friends with God; he's already a friend with you.”
“We should accustom ourselves to speak in pleasant tones; to use pure, correct language, and words that are kind and courteous. Kind words are as dew and gentle showers to the soul. The scripture says of Christ that grace was poured into His lips, that He might ‘know how to speak a word in season to him that is weary.’ And the Lord bids us, ‘Let your speech be always with grace,’ ‘that it may minister grace unto the hearers.’
“Some with whom you are brought in contact will be rough and uncourteous, but because of this, do not be less courteous yourself. He who wishes to preserve his own self-respect must be careful not to wound needlessly the self-respect of others. This rule should be sacredly observed toward the dullest, the most blundering. What God intends to do with these apparently unpromising ones, you do not know. He has in the past accepted persons no more promising or attractive to do a great work for Him. His spirit, moving upon the heart, has aroused every faculty to vigorous action. The Lord saw in those rough, unhewn stones precious material that would stand the test of storm and heat and pressure. God sees not as man sees. He does not judge from appearances, but He searches the heart, and judges righteously” (Ellen G. White, Review and Herald, August 20, 1959 par. 13}
WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH ME?
Where are you when it comes to relationships with the other gender? Are you interested? Too busy? Annoyed? Remember, as you head into your teen years, there is no perfect time to begin to date, but the time is always perfect for learning about what makes the other gender tick! Take as much time as you can to learn how to communicate and understand (as best we can) the other gender. This can be frustrating, it can be annoying, and it can be rewarding. The truth is, we are all created in God’s image, and He loves each one of us, regardless of what gender we are. In fact, He’s the one who made us who we are!
- What is the best way to deal with the other gender, according to what you have studied so far?
- What is the key to any friendship?
- God made us and knows us the best. If you have a people problem who should be able to help you the most?
- What have you learned about relationships this week that you didn’t already know?
- How should God fit into any of our relationships?
“‘Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the first commandment. And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.’ Mark 12:30, 31.
“On these two commandments the whole interest and duty of moral beings hang. Those who do their duty to others as they would that others should do to them are brought into a position where God can reveal Himself to them. They will be approved of Him. They are made perfect in love, and their labors and prayers will not be in vain. They are continually receiving grace and truth from the Fountainhead, and as freely transmitting to others the divine light and salvation they receive. . . .
“Selfishness is abomination in the sight of God and holy angels. Because of this sin many fail to attain the good which they are capable of enjoying. They look with selfish eyes on their own things, and do not love and seek the interest of others as they do their own. They reverse God's order. Instead of doing for others what they wish others to do for them, they do for themselves what they desire others to do for them, and do to others what they are most unwilling to have returned to them” (God’s Amazing Grace, p. 296).
Ephesians 5:21 (Contemporary English Version)
“Honor Christ and put others first.”
- How does selfishness affect friendships?
- When someone is different from you are you ever tempted to try and make him or her more like you? Should you do something else? If so what?
HOW DOES IT WORK?
Phone or e-mail two people, one guy and one girl, and ask them each the following questions. Make sure to write down their responses in the space given so you have a great view of the differences between guys and girls.
1. What is your favorite type of video?
a. Guyb. Girl
2. What do you like to do in your free time?
a. Guyb. Girl
3. What do the words “I like you” mean to you?
a. Guyb. Girl
4. How much time do you spend on the telephone, My Space, and/or Facebook each day talking to friends?
a. Guyb. Girl
5. When do you think guys and girls should start dating exclusively? (Dating just one person as opposed to being friends with lots of different people.)
a. Guyb. Girl